“Oh my God! I didn’t think you could make it! John! John! Come in here. This is my best friend from high school and college Francine!
“Oh, my God I can’t believe you were able to actually make it here to be with us today! This is all just so overwhelming!
“Well, come in, come in. Everyone is in the living room on their phones getting ready. There are drinks and appetizers in the kitchen, help yourself!
“I don’t think we’re expecting anyone else so let’s get this started.
“Everyone! John and I are so glad you could be with us for our Making Our Relationship Facebook Official Shower! This has been the craziest month and a half in my life and we are just so glad you could be here with us to celebrate this very important day with us.
“I know you guys know how we met, because your News Feed was probably filled with updates on that. But you probably don’t know how John actually popped the question. There are tissues nearby just in case you get a little misty-eyed.
“John and I were having dinner at a Chinese restaurant by the mall. He looked so handsome, even more so than usual. I had a feeling he might be up to something. He was kind of being quiet and shy, which is so unlike him.
“We had dinner and everything was normal and then the fortune cookies came and I opened mine up and inside it said, ‘Will you like to make our relationship Facebook Official.’
“A bunch of wait-staff had peeked around the corners and from the kitchen. They were so in on it. I started to well up a little bit but then meked out a ‘yes.’
“People started clapping and cheering. We heard congratulations from across the dining room. It was a lot to take in, but it was absolutely perfect.
“So I know this is the moment you’ve all been waiting for so everyone go onto their phones and get on to Facebook. Just check out your News Feed, because John and I are going to flip the switch over to being Facebook official ‘In a Relationship.’
“Okay, refresh your News Feed.
“Keep refreshing, you see it? You see it! Hooray we did it, we are now Facebook official!
“Thank you guys so much for being here with us for this. We have a lot more activities planned, we have a Candy Crush tournament and Chromecast hooked up if you want to broadcast a Cat Video on to the big screen.
“Oh and just so you guys know my roommate is planning on getting home from work in about a half-hour, she worked an early shift so we might have to keep it down. Thanks again everyone for coming!”